Have you experienced this moment?
That enlightening moment
when suddenly everything is beautiful
and mysterious and surreal and unnatural
and your eyes span the scene playing out around you
and you wonder, with watering eyes
and a full heart, "What is this
enchanting and peculiar process we
deem "life"?- and how did I get so lucky
to experience all its fullness,
right here and right now..."

My heart is full of ideas;
my mind is full of questions.

So many places I could be,
people I could become,
sights to be seen,
lives to be understood -

but I am here.

And is here
where I am intended to be? -
I think yes,
but a defying opinion
arises when I consider
the vast possibilities in life,
the potential that humans hold
to paint their existence
in whichever way they please.

Something is growing in me,
inspiring me to discover, to become,
and that something feels a lot like
a pull in the right direction.

But for now -
I am here;
and the present
is the only reality
that I know.

Life is a crazy occurrence. Reality is unnatural, but we as humans (limited beings) have made it out to be natural, normal, monotonous...

Let's think this through.

People - our feet are bound to a water-filled, land-covered orb suspended in space. There are billions of orbs like ours floating around us, but we inhabit this one. No one is one hundred percent certain as to why we're here, experiencing all these moments of pain and joy, connecting to fellow wayfarer's around us. We can claim ideas and explanations and faiths in an attempt to process why we exist here, in this place, in this time, but I am convinced that nothing is certain. Maybe certainty is overrated. Maybe to be uncertain is to be in the minority - to be in love with life regardless of explanation. How the moments fit together, what they mean, and the excitement of not yet knowing the moments that will come - uncertainty is beautiful.

What I am convinced of is that there is some force greater, beyond our comprehension, that explains the reasoning behind our seemingly irrational existence. We have to trust that force in an attempt to remain sane. If we had no purpose or reason for living, then how could we trek on? We're all trusting something - that something that keeps us alive and feeling worthy of breath. It's keeping us passionate about moving forward, it's our explanation, our flame of existence.

As if contemplating why we're here isn't bewildering enough, there's this all-embracing theory that has been long claimed to explain it all -

Love.

In each religion, spirituality, in each heart and mind, there is this strong universal concept that connects us to people and activities and life in a way that we are unable to fully describe. How interesting that the closest way I can explain my existence on this earth is by a concept of feeling that's nearly unexplainable.

Feelings of love trounce me. Talk of love overwhelms me. Attempting to rationalize why I'm madly in love with my passions burdens me. I don't want to explain it - I can't explain it. I have no answer for it. But I can feel it.

How something can be equally simple and complex at the same moment, as it is with love, strikes me as indescribable. And for some odd reason I am comforted by explaining my existence with an unexplainable concept. This reassures me that the pressure is not on me, a single, minuscule human being, to create a purpose for myself. The purpose already lives inside of me, it flows from me naturally. The purpose is love - a force beyond it all.

Life, the process of existing, is a crazy occurence.
I have found it to in no way be natural, normal, or monotonous.

Where is the logic in Love?

Love dispels reason.

I'm convinced that Love dispels everything -

it is the core, the answer,

the God that we all search for (in some form or another).

It is interwoven in our hearts.

It has always been there,

and it will always be there.

When we tap into our inner source of Love

we become who we were intended to be -

beings not built on logic and explanation,

but instead on Love and feeling.

I'm dying to know -
what does your mind feel like?

Is it swirling, spinning,
uncontrollable,
and terrifying?
Is it taking over
the place of your heart?
Is it detrimental?
Is it consuming from
the inside out?

Or is it peaceful?
Does it hold the truth?

Snow

Where are You
in the still of today.
It's quiet -
but Your voice, audible, fluttering
dances in my ears.

How present are You?
Just how close to my heart?
I feel intertwined
with the mystery
of Your presence.

Written January 30th, 2014

I have no words today
to express my heavy heart.
But, I will try.
When I'm alone,
the answers escape me,
thoughts burst and explode in my head -
They're taking over!
But then people come along
and I see the answers in their hearts -
Love them! - God tells me